Sanctuary Earth
by Tapangwa
Summary: with their lives on the line, the Tallest have only one planet they can hide out on. RAPR in later chapters. open to flames
1. Chapter 1

Tapan: this story has been waiting so patiently, I'm proud of it for that /pets the story/ good story. Now you get rewarded.

Torna: you know, if you continue to do stuff like this people are going to wonder about you sanity.

Jhkitty: oh, I'm WAY past wondering.

Torna: you don't count.

Jhkitty/glares/ and why not?

Torna: Because you have no thumbs.

Jhkitty: what/looks at his paws/ ;-; I use to have thumbs. I loved them /sniffle/ people use to respect me! And I use to eat bagels, and dance around/cries/ now I can't, I CAN'T EVEN WEAR PANTS/runs away, crying/

Tapan: now look what you did!

Torna/shrugs/

Disclaimer: I don't own Invader Zim. That belongs to the sobbing cat in the corner. Oh and Nickelodeon!

Warning: Slash! RAPR and hints of ZADR! Not in this chapter but later on!like my other story, flame if you wish.

Sanctuary Earth

* * *

"Um sirs?" 

"Not now can't you see we're busy." Red tapped the controller rapidly. "No! That wasn't fair!"

Purple snickered. "You just mad you losing."

The small pilot spoke again, a little more demanding. "My Tallests!"

"WHAT DO YOU WANT?" the crimson tallest roared, so loud his co leader nearly fell out of his seat.

The irken took a step back, trying to add a little bit of space between him and the tall one. "W-we have some information on the Resisties. It seems they rebuilt and are ten times stronger than they were the last time." He pulled papers out and handed them to Red. "We sent in a spy to figure out what they were planning. It seems their mission as of now is assassination."

Purple shot up from his seat. "What?"

Red eyes scanned the paper, nodding. "'What' indeed." He looked up from the paper and glared down at small irken. "You sent in a spy without authorization from one of us? TO THE DUNGEON WITH HIM!" The papers were snatched from his hand.

Purple glared at him before looking at the documents. "I authorized it." He stopped the guards from taking the irken, who I'm calling Bill for now on. "Is there anyway to stop them?"

"You authorized without telling me?" Red's eyes widened.

Purple and Bill ignored him.

Bill shook his head. "Their defenses are too high. Our best chance is to hide you two."

"YOU authorized…without telling…. ME?"

Purple sighed and turned to Red. "I did tell you. In fact." The violet leader pulled a disc from his pocket. "I caught it on video tape." He put the disc in. on the giant scream appeared Red and Purple. Red had his head shoved in a bag of popcorn. Purple held his own bag in his hands, taking out a modest handful at a time.

Purple swallowed, and then looked over at Red. "I'm authorizing that spy."

"Uh-huh."

The disc stopped. Blinking, Red looked over at Purple. "That wasn't fair."

"Well neither is life, Red my friend."

I do not like green eggs and ham. Uh, back to the fic!

Red sighed. "Okay, fine. What do we do about it?"

Bill cleared his tiny throat. "Sirs? If I may. I suggest you hide out on a planet they wouldn't think to look."

"Hmmm." Purple scratched his chin. "That could work."

"But what planet?" Red pulled at his antenna, thinking. "it would need to be somewhere out of the empire. Somewhere far away."

"Where the people are dumb so we won't be noticed."

"But tall so we'll blend in."

They paused.

Then the communicator beeped.

"Incoming transmission from planet Earth."

Purple glanced over at his co- Tallest with a hopeful demeanor

Red glared at Purple. "Oh, HELL no!"

"But come on! The planet fits the needs!"

"No!"

"But it works!"

"I'm not sharing another planet with that. That." His voice lowered to a whisper. "Psycho."

"You won't have to see him."

"I don't need to!"

"C'mon! I'd like to live!"

"All the more reason not to go to Earth!"

Purple paused and turned away for a moment.

This made Red a little nervous. "Uh, Pur?"

The violet tallest turned back, his eyes rimmed with tears. His lip quivered slightly, making Red feel a little guilty.

But not so much to give in.

Yet. "Wouldn't we be safer on another planet? C'mon!"

Purple let out a small whimper, causing Red to hesitate.

After a moment, he sighed. "Fine! We'll go to Earth." He all but grumbled the last part.

Like a faucet, the tears stopped and Purple smiled triumphantly at he co-leader. It was always so easy for him to win over the crimson leader. It made him wonder why sometimes.

* * *

"I can't believe we're doing this." Red growled and crossed his arms. They stood in a smaller ship watching as it got closer and closer to the planet. 

Beside them, stood another irken with two little wires to wrap around their heads, much like the one Tak wore.

The irken handed one to each of them as Bill explained how they worked. "sirs, these are your disguises for your time on earth. Both of them were made to suit you personalities in order to fully blend into the planet's population.

The stuck the little wires on and it automaticly began to change the irkens' forms. Red looked down at his hand, seeing more fingers added and taking a peachy skin tone. He felt something grow around the antennas on the top of his head and fell into his face. Red hair. His clothes changed into simple jeans and a red shirt to match his new hair color, his boots stayed with a few large buckles added around them. On his back, a black trench coat created itself.

And then he felt his chest get slightly heavier.

Looking down to see two large bubbles of flesh obstructing his view from the floor.

Panicked, he grabbed them and glared at Bill. "What the hell are these!"

Bill chuckled nervously. "We believe that in order to make the resistance blind to your presence on Earth, we'd need to disguise you as a female."

Red looked like he was going to kill… or she looked…you know, whatever. "Why you little son of a--"

"I feel pretty."

Red blinked and looked over at his/her co-leader. The girl he saw had long purple hair with eyes to match. Her shirt was pitch black with a dark purple mini skirt and knee-high boots. The skirt ended a little above mid thigh, showing the milky white legs.

Purple twirled around, watching as the skirt lifted slightly, then fell when the twirling stopped.

The amethyst leader looked up at the silence to find everyone staring at him/her. "What?"

Bill cleared his throat. "We have a house set up for you in a small neighborhood, the directions are in the pod along with the keys to the door. Your disguises are of two high school girls, in which you are to be enrolled. They will be expecting you tomorrow. Good-bye, my Tallests!" he bowed as the floor opened up and the two leaders fell into an escape pod preset for Earth. The pod was released from the ship and basically fell into the planet.

The ship landed in an old park, the night sky covered it nicely. Stepping out to observe their surroundings, Red was immediately degusted. "I don't want to be here!"

Purple stumbled out with the keys and the directions. "I know, but lets just try to make the best of it for now!" taking the other's hand, the purple one walked down the street, reading the instructions on where to go.

* * *

They stood before the house they'd be living in for god-knows how long. 

Red snorted. "this is it? I'd rather be on the massive, fighting the resistance to the death!"

"Shhh. Do you wanna wake up the whole planet?" Purple glared and looked around at the houses next to them. "at least the neighbors seem to keep to themselves. Look at the little electric fence they have up."

Red looked toward the direction Purple was gesturing. "I think that's just so everyone will stay off their grass."

"Still. Now let's go inside instead of standing out here like idiots." With that, the purple leader walked up to the door, unlocked it and walked in.

Red shoved his/her hands in the trench coat pockets and followed with a grimace.

* * *

Tapan: now wasn't that fun! This is just the beginning! 

Torna: obviously.

Tapan: hmph! So please feed the writer! R&R!


	2. Chapter 2

Tapan: I'm in MAINE as I write this. Whoo/dances/

Torna: would you stop, you ninny!

Tapan: NEVER!

Jhkitty: what is wrong with you?

Tapan: would you like the list my therepist gave me?

Jhkitty/sighs/ no.

Tapan: okay then!

Disclaimer: I don't own Invader Zim or anything else that is used in this fic, unless it's the plot and Red and Purple's disguises. So no suing!

Warning: RAPR, hints of ZADR and even a little RADR (Red/ Dib for anyone that didn't know) flame if you wish!

* * *

Morning, and after a long, hard night of figuring out people are trying to kill you, the tallest fell asleep. Red laid in the bed, slightly uncomfortable, but had been able to fall asleep finally.

Then he was hit with a pillow.

He jumped up to see Purple, already in his disguise, holding the fluffy object.

He glared. "What?"

Purple was unfazed by the tone. "It's time to get up, we have a school to sign up for."

Red groaned and fell back down. "I don't wanna gooooo!" he then buried his head under the pillow.

It was Purple's turn to glare. "We have to, in order to blend in."

"This plan is stupid!"

Purple opened his mouth to retort, but stopped when he heard some commotion from next door.

"IT WASN'T ME I SWEAR! COULD YOU PUT THE KNIFE DOWN PLEASE!"

"NO! I'LL KILL YOU, DIB! AND I'M NOT KIDDING THIS TIME, I WILL ACTUALLY STOP YOUR HEART!"

There was a blood-chilling scream.

Red sat up and turned his disguise on. "Well, I guess I'm not getting back to sleep now!" s/he pushed off the bed, stretched and walked down the hallway, looking out the window just in time to see a black-haired boy run out of the house next door, screaming. Behind him, was a magenta haired girl with a very sharp looking dagger.

The crimson leader blinked and turned around to face Purple. "So are we going?"

Purple's face lit up and started toward the door, Red following closely behind

* * *

. 

"Your names?" the man sat behind a large desk, writing information on a stack of papers. On the other side, the disguise Tallests sat, Purple watched intently, Red played with her hair.

The violet world leader hesitated. "P- phoebe."

The man wrote it down then turned his attention to the other girl. "And yours."

"Red." She spoke without faltering, then put her feet up on the desk, ignoring her companion's death glare.

"'Red'?" he glanced down at the boots. "Eh, could you please take your boots off my desk."

Red rolled her eyes and pulled her feet off the desk as the man continued with the questioning.

* * *

"I can't believe you!" the leader re-dubbed "Phoebe" stormed ahead of her partner, angry.

Red tuned out Purple's ranting as they walked down the sidewalk on their way back home.

The angry girl realized this and turned. "You're not even listening, are you?"

The red head smiled and shoved her hands into her jean pockets. "I stopped listening somewhere around the first 'Dammit, Red!'" she chuckled as "Phoebe's" face heated in anger.

"Be serious! People are going to end up seeing right through your disguise!" she walked up to swat the other upside the head but missed. Groaning in frustration, she stormed back ahead until a strong gust of wind blew past, causing Purple's skirt and Red's trench coat to lift.

The amethyst girl squealed and pushed the front of the material down in a vain attempt to keep the cold air out.

Red snickered, unfazed by the wind. "At least my disguise keeps out the draft!"

"Phoebe" growled and continued to walk on.

* * *

"Ugh! Thank whatever God this planet prays to that we don't have to go to that skool thing today." As soon as the door was shut, Red turned off his disguise and fell down on the couch face first.

Phoebe walked into the living room and threw the keys on an end table before also turning off her disguise. Purple adjusted his robe, relieved. He looked over at the couch to see the crimson leader stretched out on it comfortably.

Red glanced at the coffee table to see the remote lying there. Without moving, he reached for it, to find it just out of his reach. He growled and tried to reach further, before giving up and whining, "Pur!"

Purple rolled his eyes and crossed his arms, but otherwise didn't move. "So lazy."

Red pouted then stretched out toward it, claws hardly brushing the plastic.

The violet leader simply walked away.

* * *

The rest of the time at their new house went by quickly, which is surprising since they were probably bored out of their royal alien minds. But the time did go by and sooner than Red would've liked, Phoebe was dragging her down the sidewalk in order to go to skool.

As they got closer and closer to the skool, Red spotted some commotion outside the doors, containing the girl's new neighbor and a certain alien.

Red growled at the sight of Zim before whispering to Phoebe. "I thought you promised me that I wouldn't have to see that little headache."

The violet girl smiled sheepishly. "Just don't look at him." She paused and looked over at them. "Besides, he's not too 'little' anymore."

Red looked over at Zim to see his co-leader was right. Zim had grown, not much but enough where he didn't look awkward in the crowd. She growled. "That doesn't stop him from being an idiot."

Phoebe shrugged and watched as the pale boy ranted about something.

"Hey! We live next door to him!" Red shouted and pointed at the boy.

Everyone turned to face the two, confused and suspicious. Even the two fighting boys turned to look at them.

Phoebe chuckled nervously at the people before pulling Red into the building.

* * *

"So, you're the new girl?" Phoebe turned at her table to the girl that spoke to see three of them standing before her.

The middle girl had long, blond hair with earrings following around the lobe. Behind her stood the two girls on either side. Both of them looked almost exactly the same; dyed black hair, thick make up and very pale skin.

The violet haired girl hesitated before smiling politely. "Yeah I am. My name's phoebe. And you are?"

The blond snorted. " I didn't ask your name." She paused to turn her nose up. "I'm Jessica and this is Taylor and Tyler."

Phoebe cocked an eyebrow. /ooookay. / "Nice to meet you." She turned away.

Jessica scoffed and walked away, the two girls following, nearly knocking over the boy walking in. the girls glared at him as well, muttering something about freaks taking over.

The boy was clearly used to it as he glanced around the room. Right behind him, Red put a hand on his shoulder in a friendly manner and walked over to Phoebe. The boy seemed slightly nervous, but followed anyway.

"Phoebe!" Red smiled at the girl. "I'd like you to meet my new friend." She sat down, pulling the boy with her. The amethyst girl sucked at a juice box as the other did introductions. "Phoebe, this is Dib. Dib, Phoebe."

Phoebe spit out the mouth full of juice. "Dib!"

Dib flinched and wiped the juice off his face. "Uh, yeah."

Red was unfazed. "Dib is looking for help in defeating the evil alien trying to take over this planet. I told him we could help."

Phoebe glared at Red before smiling at Dib. "Oh, I see. But I'm sorry, Dib, I won't be much help. You'll need to depend mostly on Red. Speaking of which, would you excuse us for a minute." As she was speaking, she walked around the table, grabbed the red head by the arm and dragged her away from the boy and to the doors of the lunchroom.

Once they were out the doors, Phoebe smiled at her companion. "Red, buddy of mine." She pulled on a handful of the red hair, forcing Red's head lower than her own. "What are you DOING?"

Red pulled her hair out of Phoebe's hand. "Don't ya see, Pur? This is the perfect opportunity to rid us of Zim! Forever!"

Phoebe cocked an eyebrow and put her hands on her hips.

"Look." Red put her hands on the other girl's shoulders. "We tell Dib all of Zim's weaknesses, he confronts Zim, destroys the psycho, and we live the rest of our days ZIM-FREE. It's fool proof!"

"Except for when you slip up on your own disguise and he figures out you're the one Zim gets the orders from."

"That a risk we'll just need to take." Red turned away. "And he won't figure it out. My disguise is too good to see through!" she walked back in.

Phoebe rolled her eyes. "Whatever you say, Red." She followed the other girl in.

* * *

Hours after skool let out, Purple watched out the window as Red and Dib sat on the roof, speaking about Zim and observing the stars. He glared at them, a little suspicious of Red's motives. Yes, the idea of getting rid of Zim was a relief but why use Dib?

He turned around and walked away from the window before Red saw him staring and Dib saw him out of his disguise.

Meanwhile, on the roof: "you seem to know a lot about these irkens already." Red looked impressed and slightly surprised.

Dib smiled and nodded. "Yeah, I've been watching him for years. You know, studying his moves and stuff." He leaned back slightly and stared at the stars. "I also have an irken alien ship in the garage. I got it fixed, but it ended up breaking again about a year later."

"And you haven't been able to fix it again." The red head smiled at the paranormalist knowingly.

He spoke flatly. "Yeah."

"You think I could take a look at it? Maybe I could help."

He looked skeptically. "Sure, if you want. I'll show you." He stood up and offered his hand to Red, who accepted it and was pulled to her feet.

She followed Dib to the garage, smiling at Gaz as they past her. The younger girl opened her eye slightly before continuing on her way, muttering something about aliens and her idiot brother.

The light turned on as they walked in the garage. The ship sat in the middle of the floor, cold. Opening it, Dib pressed a few buttons and the ship came to life.

Red observed it, pretending to never see such technology. "So, what's wrong with it?"

"It stopped flying. It must've been put together wrong when it was last fixed."

The glass to the cockpit opened, allowing Red to look in. she leaned in and pressed a few buttons, causing the panel to open. Dib's eyes widened as she looked in curiously. "What if you attach the white wires together and the red ones to the inside of the ship?"

Hesitantly, Dib reached in at attached the wires to their respective places. The machine hummed louder and began to hover. He gasped and backed away before turning to Red. "H-how did you know?"

Her red eyes widened and chuckled nervously. "Uuuh, lucky guess." The nervous chuckles died and the two just stared at each other before turning their attention back on the ship.

* * *

An hour later, Red walked back into the house she shared. Shutting the door, she walked into the dark living room to see a pair of glowing purple eyes. They glared at her. It would almost be spooky, if she didn't know the owner personally. "How's your little pet?"

She sighed. "He's not my pet, Purple. Let's just say it's my form of entertainment."

He snorted. "So, that's what they call it here?"

She turned off the disguise. "What's that I sense in your voice? Resentment? Doubt? Jealousy?"

Purple eyes widened. "O-of course not!"

The crimson alien snorted before walking upstairs. "Whatever." he flipped the light switch on his way up, causing Purple to come in view. "You shouldn't sit in the dark, it's bad for your eyes." With that, he closed the door to some room upstairs.

* * *

Tapan/squeals/ this couple ROCKS! I should write them more often.

Torna/shrugs/ I like the way you did Red.

Jhkitty/eye twitches/

Tapan/starry eyes/ oooh, Torna. You actually complemented my work/hugs Torna/ I love you!

Torna/rolls eyes/

Tapan: well, that's all for now. See ye later!


	3. Chapter 3

Tapan: I'm going to college soon ;-;.

Torna: isn't that a good thing?

Tapan: not completely. I'll be too busy with college to update my ficcies as often as I do now!

Jhkitty: good! You better not drop out of college!

Torna: I didn't know you even cared.

Jhkitty/scratches back of ear in that cute, kitty way/ I don't. I'm looking forward to the slow updates!

Tapan: that's not very nice!

Disclaimer: I don't own Invader Zim, Jhonen and Nickelodeon do! So don't sue me. I did, however, think up this plot. So, please just don't steal my story, that'll make me very, very sad.

Warning: slash! RAPR, ZADR in later chapters and a little RADR (I know it disturbs some people, but hey! I felt like throwing something new into the mix!) Flame if you wish. But I now see how it is; you flamers only flame those who don't ask for it! Cowards…

* * *

Red panted as she ran down the hallway of the school, late for class. This class, right before lunch, she cut yesterday after discovering Phoebe wasn't in it. She pushed the door open, panting and looking wildly around the room until her eyes landed on a familiar boy near the window. 

Her stomach cringed and she suddenly wished that she could just cut this class everyday.

The teacher glared at her as the class snickered. "And you would be?"

She swallowed the rest of her pant and sighed. "Yeah, I'm new, and it says I'm suppose to be here."

He glanced down at the attendance list. "Oh, right. Red." He looked back up at her. "Why weren't you here yesterday?"

"Uh, my." She paused and scratched the nape of her neck, trying to remember the human family members. "Mother got sick."

He glared, obviously not believing her. "Fine, I'll let you off this time." He looked around the room for an empty seat, and then pointed at one near the back. "There's a seat open next to Zim. He's the green kid in the far corner."

She looked over slowly, thinking to herself. /please let it be some normal human with the same name. And skin tone. / She looked over at Zim to find the poorly disguised alien to be glaring at her.

The red head's world just seemed to fall apart right then. The one class, the _one _class she didn't have with her purple companion! And she was sitting right next to the person she hated more than anyone in the universe.

Forcing a smile she looked over at the teacher, then hesitantly moved to her new seat.

She continued to smile until everyone turned back to whatever they were doing. She then glared and looked over at Zim, who did the same thing, slightly confused.

"Okay, now listen." She hissed and leaned toward him slightly. "I don't like you and you don't like me. So if you want to keep all your limbs you will not talk to me, you will not look at me, you will not so much as breath on me. Now, Zim, do I make myself perfectly clear."

The invader cocked an eye, surprised at the sudden outburst of hatred. He opened his mouth to speak.

Red's glare deepened as she put a finger up to silence him. "Not, a word!"

Zim's mouth clamped shut and he turned back to his paper, scribbling something down on it. Red glanced over, a little curious to see a list of names. The paper read People to keep an eye on. Dib's name was at the top, underlined and starred. The name Tak was underlined as well, but also crossed out. A few other choice names were on the list, but at the bottom he put "Red" with a sloppy star right next to it.

Red rolled her eyes, and then put her head down until lunch came around.

* * *

"Look, Red. I'm sorry you've got a class with Zim. But there's nothing we can do about it!" 

"You told me I didn't have to see him! You lied to me, Pur!"

"Would you stop calling me 'Pur'!"

"Never!"

The two glared at each other before Phoebe gave in and looked away, sucking on a juice box idly before coughing a little, looking at it in disgust, and throwing it to the side unceremoniously.

The juice box then ended up hitting someone. "Ack! My new shirt!" Jessica glared over at Phoebe. The violet haired girl just stared blankly. "What is wrong with you? Do you realize how expensive this shirt was?"

Red propped her head up with her hand, watching the blond rant before speaking. "You do know that it didn't even spill on your precious shirt, right? Do you really need to verbally abuse someone?"

Jessica turned her glare toward the red head. "You stay out of this! It's none of your business!"

Red cocked an eyebrow before causally standing up, taking the tray of mush in front of her and, as if it was normal, shoved the tray into the blonde's chest, causing the disgusting school concoction to pour all over the shirt. "There, now it is my business. Now piss off."

Jessica stared down at the shirt before letting out a shriek, so loud someone would think she was in pain. She glared up at Red, and then quivered uncontrollably. Her little posse then came and dragged her away.

Phoebe turned and glared half-heartedly at Red. "I could've handled that, you know."

Red sighed and sat back down. "Yeah, I know. You were just taking too long." She looked around to see everyone in the lunchroom staring at her. After all, she just slimed one of the most popular girls in the school, why wouldn't they stare.

She ignored them and slammed her head down on the table.

* * *

"So, if his pak is his weakness, why not just pull it off and be down with it?" Red blinked, playing stupid with the paranormalist on their walk home. 

"I did that once." He shoved his hands in his pockets, suppressing a shudder from the memory. "It attached itself it my back and I started acting like him."

The two continued to think of a plan to destroy the invader. Behind them, Phoebe glared at them, and Gaz walked next to her, occupied by her Game Slave.

After a moment of this, the younger girl spoke. "Dib's gay."

Phoebe blinked in confusion and turned to Gaz. The girl didn't look up from her game. "You don't have to worry about him and Red."

Phoebe scoffed and turned away. "I'm not worried."

"You're a terrible liar." She paused. "Although, he doesn't know he's gay yet, so I guess you still have to worry a little."

Phoebe cocked an eyebrow and looked back forward to see if the two heard the girl.

Dib was too engrossed in the conversation to hear anything from the two behind him. The other leader, however, did hear but didn't allow it to show on her face. In fact, if it wasn't for working with Red since they were smeet, Phoebe wouldn't have known the crimson haired girl heard.

But Red did hear, and she didn't seem at all surprised.

* * *

Hours later, Red walked back into the house after yet another long conversation about irken's with Dib. Eagerly, he turned off his disguise and plopped back down on the couch. 

Until he heard a pained scream come from the kitchen.

Startled, he shot up and ran to the kitchen to see Purple holding his arm in pain. On the floor was some broken glass and a puddle of water. Red walked over to it to observe, sticking a long claw into the water, only to shoot his hand back as the liquid burnt his skin. "What the--?"

_This_ was something Zim never mentioned!

Red shook off his hand, and then walked over to the other leader, taking Purple's hand off the wound to inspect it.

Purple's eyes widened a little as he felt his hand slip off the burn and into the other irken's, forcing back a blush. He was a little confused on why he was beginning to blush and why his heart wouldn't slow down.

Red, oblivious to his co leader's inner battle, poked at the burn curiously. This snapped Purple back to reality and whimper slightly. The crimson leader looked into the violet eyes and blinked.

They stood there for a few minutes, perfectly frozen in place. Red still holding Purple's wrist, other hand on his arm as they maintained eye contact.

After a moment, Purple spoke softly. "I think I'm alright."

Red blinked then let go of the other, slightly reluctant. He went to walk away before stopping and realizing there were no service drones to clean the mess made in the floor. He sighed and turned back to help clean it up.

* * *

Tapan: it gets all fluffy at the end! And to anyone who cares to know; I was listening to I Caught Fire by The Used as I wrote this chapter. That's a lovely song! So! R&R, maybe I'll get a few new chapters in before school begins! 


	4. Chapter 4

Tapan: Yay! A new chapter! And Jhonen, Masochist said she might give ya a cat toy if you behave

Torna: you think that'll make a difference?

Jhkitty: n.n kitty toy/tongue pokes out of his mouth/

Torna: I stand corrected. Why does Jhonen get all the good stuff?

Jhkitty: Jealous? Well, it's quite simple, really. I'm cuter than you are. By a lot.

Torna/growling, pulls out a mallet/ didn't you say once you loved seeing cute things in pain?

Jhkitty/yelps and runs off, Torna chasing behind/

Tapan: uuh..

Disclaime: I don't own Invader Zim, and unless Jhonen leaves his half to me in his will, I never will own it. So shh, the walls have ears

Warning: RAPR, hints of ZADR and a little bit of RADR. Flame if you wish!

* * *

At the edge of the little cul-de-sac, our favorite large headed boy and his new companion watch Zim's house. They had been in that same position of the last half hour.

Needless to say, Red was bored of just sitting and watching. She sighed and leaned back a bit, still looking at the eerie green house. "it seems to me that you already know plenty about these irkens. Why not just walk up to the door, drag him out and bring him to some place that'll believe you, like those swollen eyeball guys."

Dib took the binoculars away from his eyes and blink, having trouble thinking of a valid answer for Red. It wasn't as if the alien's defenses were overwhelmingly high, so he could do that. But, then again, the girl didn't know that.

Or so he thought. "His base is protecting him. No one can get near that door."

Red cocked an eyebrow and stood up, brushing off her clothes. "I have a feeling you're the one protecting him." She muttered before walking to the door.

"What?" the boy looked at her confused.

She didn't answer and simply walked out from their hiding spot and up to the door. Still confused, and fearful for someone's life, he followed at her heels as she simply walked up to the small pathway leading to the porch.

One of the gnomes turned to her; it's eyes scanning her body. After going into a simple x-ray mode, it saw the Tallest beneath the female disguise. It then turned back to its proper place, completely ignoring the paranormalist.

Clearing her throat, Red knocked on the door. Within a second, she was staring at a floating moose and the small "advanced" robot.

GIR looked up at the two. "Hi there!"

"Where's Zim?" Red didn't hesitate to ask the question; she wanted to end this as soon as possible. She also wanted to be back on the massive, but you really can't always get what you want.

GIR poked his tongue out of his mouth, the moose squeaked and rolled around in the air before flying off. The little robot then snapped out of whatever trance he was in and smiled widely. "I is gonna go get him." With that, he ran into the house, leaving the door open for the two "guests".

Opening the trashcan, he stuck his head inside. "Mastah! Tallest Red-red and Dibbles is here!"

Red's eyes widened. How did GIR know that?

Dib seemed to catch what the SIR unit said as well, but didn't question the red head.

"The tallest? Here, now?" the elevator in the can seemed to move at an impossible speed as Zim got to the surface, antennae twitching in excitement. He didn't bother donning his disguise; what would be the point? Tallest Red obviously knew he was irken and Dib has seen his true form countless times.

His eyes widened, however, when he saw not the Tallest, but the new girl that threatened him. Seeing this, he did what he does best.

He screamed. "GIR! YOU TRICKED MEEE! HOW DARE YOU FOOL YOUR MASTER!" as if it would make a difference, he dove behind the couch, trying to hide his exposed alien form.

Red rolled her eyes. "yeah, we get it! Now let's go before I have to throw you in a bag and drag you."

He stood up, hands on his hips. "Oh yeah? Well, you'll have ta catch me first." He turned, and ran toward his lab.

But Red beat him to the elevators and grabbed him by the nape of the neck.

Zim struggled against the hold, wondering how the human knew him well enough to anticipate his moves.

Red sighed, eyes glazed over in that pure bored stare you often see on the tallest. "Alright, let's go." She started to the door, until Dib stopped her.

He pushed his back to it, arms spread to each side, preventing the red girl from leaving with the alien. "Red, we can't do this."

"Why not? You've got him right where you want him. Hell, you could kill him if you wished.

Zim continued to struggle, before screaming out that all to familiar line. "GIR! Defensive mode!"

GIR, who had been right next to them the whole time, grabbed mini moose and jumped on it's back before flying out the window, crashing through the pane in the process.

Red blinked. "Anyway, just take him down to your lab and dissect him! What's the big deal, you told me you've been waiting for this moment for years."

"And I have."

"Then what's stopping you?"

Dib hesitated. "I…"

Red watched impatiently.

"I…want to… do it myself." Dib dropped his arms and walked to Red. "This is my battle, it always has been. And it…just doesn't feel right that…"

Red nodded and threw Zim at the human. "I understand."

Zim let out a yelp as he stumbled toward his enemy, surprised to find himself being caught in Dib's arms. Even more surprised to find himself liking it, but we'll get to that later

Red stuffed her hands in her pockets and headed to the door. "Well, I better get going." _Wow, that was extremely unproductive!_

Scrambling out of the boy's arms, Zim stood up. "Wait! You can't just leave!"

"Watch me." She opened the door.

"COMPUTER! Stop the red one!" he pointed his finger dramatically.

"No!" Zim blinked up at the wired ceiling, confused.

Red rolled her eyes and stepped out, closing the door behind her.

* * *

Red slammed the door to the house and leaned up against it, pressing the button to take off his disguise.

"Red? Is that you?"

The crimson tallest growled softly. "No, it's the queen of Meekrob. Of course it's me!"

"well, it seemed somebody had a tough day." Phoebe walked toward the door and crossed her arms, her eyebrow cocked slightly.

Red pointed at the lavender girl. "why are you still in desguise?"

Her eyes widened slightly at being questioned about it. "Wha? Oh, no reason. Just thought I'd try and get more use to it." She pulled at the skirt a little bit, looking down at it before looking back up at her fellow tallest. "so what's going on?"

"well, the large headed human named Dib won't let me get rid of Zim, which is really annoying. Oh! And Zim's robot knows who we are!" Red looked worried for a moement. "what are we suppose to do?"

Phoebe glared. "Oh, I get it! You yell at me for panicking and then go into a fit yourself. That's unfair!" the disguise was turned off, and Purple huffed, turning away from Red.

Red sighed. "Okay fine. Go ahead."

"That little robot knows who we are! HOW WAS HE ABLE TO SEE THROUGH THE DISGUISES! What if someone else can too and they come to do experiments on us. I don't wanna die here, Red! I'm too young, too important! There are so many people I haven't pummeled, so many nachos uneaten! I never got my very own TV show! It's all over, Red! We're doomed! DOOO--" a thumb less claw covered his mouth, succeeding in keeping him quiet.

Red chuckled slightly. You see, Pur, when I panic, I don't rant. I try and figure out a way to stop whatever's gone wrong." He took his hand away from the other's lips and moved away.

Purple glared halfheartedly his antennae flattening against his head. "Point taken."

Grinning at his easy victory, the crimson leader headed into the kitchen in search of some type of snack.

* * *

"I miss the massive."

"Yeah, I know you do. But we have to stay here for a while, so we might as well make the best of it."

Red crossed her arms as she almost ran into yet another student rushing to their usual place for lunch. "I really don't want to though. I just wanna go home!"

Phoebe rolled her eyes and looked forward.

"RED!" they both turned to the sound of Zim's voice. The irken glared and smirked at the same time. "I have come to end what we started yesterday!"

Red sighed as the shorted irken walked up to her. "There's nothing to settle. You're just mad that I could have easily killed you." She shrugged. "Besides, your little human mate stopped me, so what's the big deal."

Zim's eyes shot open wide, a blush running across his cheeks as he sneered and let out an angered growl. Then:

SLAP!

Red's face snapped painfully to one side, astonished the alien would hit her. Slowly, she turned her head back, giving him her own death glare before grabbing him by the neck and lifting him slightly, slamming his back into the lockers.

Zim coughed as the hand began to squeeze, his gloved claws digging into the offending hand, causing it to bleed. The blood seeped out as a dark forest green color, then changed to the crimson human blood is known for.

Red squeezed back in response. "If you know what's good for you, you will never, ever lay your filthy little mitts on me again. Do I make myself perfectly clear?" the tone she used was intimidating, something you wouldn't expect from a teenage girl.

It sounded oddly familiar to Zim. The irken looked down at the wound he created, briefly making a mental note of the color before it changed, then nodded the best he could.

Red let go, causing Zim to fall down to his knees. His hand automatically moved to his throat as he started to cough.

Still glaring down at him, Red turned away. "C'mon, Pur. Let's go."

Phoebe hesitated slightly before following her companion. "Do you think that was the best idea? You made a scene."

Red shrugged. "He shouldn't have hit me. Now maybe he learned his lesson." Red simply kept walking, feeling Zim's glare on her back.

* * *

Tapan: I feel bad for Zim at the end of this. Anyway, classes start tomorrow for me, soo yeah. expect updates to be a tad slower

Jhkitty/still running from Torna/ heeeelp meeeeeee!

Torna/mallet still in hand/ you can't run forever! You're gonna have to collapse from exhaustion sometime

Jhkitty: get away form me, psycho woman!

Tapan: uh…er…anyway! R&R! I love me the reviews/heads off to save Jhkitty from Torna's wrath/


	5. Chapter 5

Tapan: new chapter! Yay! and a big thanks to Masochist fer all of the kitty toys for Jhonen's birthday. So much love for the little kitty n.n

Torna/scratch over eye/ if she loves him so much, she should take him!

Jhkitty/somewhere in a large pile of cat toys, purring/

Tapan: aw, c'mon, Torn! He's not that bad!

Torna: and he didn't try to gouge your eye out /looks over at Jhkitty rubbing against her/ Can I help you?

Jhkitty/been sniffing a liiiittle too much catnip/ duuuuude, your hair is like soooo blue!

Torna: o.0 /inches away/

Tapan: eh, hehe

Disclaimer: I don't own Invader Zim. The drugged kitty does. And so does Nickelodeon, I think.

Warning: Slash: RAPR, ZADR, and RADR flame if you wish. C'mon, give me your best shot!

* * *

Zim watched his computer screen like he had for hours. He sat there researching different human blood disorders since skool went out and still came up empty handed.

He pulled at his antennae in frustration. "Why isn't it giving me anything?" he let go and sighed. "This Red is quite an odd one." He turned back to the panel, rubbing the bruise at his throat. "Computer, are you sure there are no human diseases?"

"I'm positive there aren't any to cause the blood to change color like it did."

The irken pause, then mused aloud. "Then what could've caused it?"

"Um, maybe she's not human."

Zim growled and pointed up at the ceiling. "I didn't ask for your opinion! Now tell me why you think this girl's blood isn't the right color!"

The computer paused, obviously confused by what its master just said. "Wait, what?"

Zim sighed exasperatedly and threw his arms into the air, but said nothing and continued to work.

* * *

Phoebe sighed and straightened her skirt before walking up to the invader's door. Clearing her throat, she knocked once before the door was opened by GIR.

The robot smiled up at her, tongue poking out the corner of his mouth. "Hiya, Purplie!" he waved enthusiastically.

Phoebe let out a nervous laugh. "Is Zim here?"

The SIR unit nodded, a clicking heard from things bouncing around in his otherwise empty head. "I'll get him for you." GIR turned around, sucked in a deep breath and screeched. "MASTAH!" Phoebe covered her ears in pain at the sound of the scream. "TALLEST PURPLIE IS HERE!"

"GIR! Why must you scream!" the irken came out of the kitchen, donning his disguise. He learned yesterday not to trust the robot when it came to visitors.

He crossed his arms and narrowed his eyes at the girl on his front stoop. "What are you doing here?"

Phoebe sighed, not too sure why she was doing this. "I came to apologize for the things Red did to you today."

Zim snorted. "I do not need your apology, so would you please be so kind as to moving yourself from my property before I do something horrible to you're filthy organs."

Phoebe blinked. She should slap him for threatening her like that, but she refrained. She came here to apologize, not start a fight.

She told herself that, yet she wasn't moving from her spot. Cocking an eyebrow at the invader, she stepped forward, into the house. When Zim refused to move, she simply pushed him.

He growled at her when he was shoved back and the purple girl walked into his base

Phoebe's face stayed stern as the small irken glared. "Now, that's no way to talk to me."

Zim's bared his teeth and reared back slightly, hands curled into tight fists. _What is it with these two?_ Clamping his jaw shut and looking at the floor, he spoke in a hiss through his teeth. "Fine, apology accepted." He looked back up at her, still glaring. "Now please leave."

Phoebe smiled and patted the irken on the head. "That's a good boy."

Zim contemplated grabbing the hand and sawing it off.

But he didn't have time, for the purple girl pulled back and walked to the door. Still smiling, she turned back. "I'll see you at school tomorrow."

He nodded curtly. "Just keep your 'Red' on a leash or something."

She laughed at the thought. Knowing he was completely serious, it died down into a chuckle. "Don't worry, just don't provoke him and you have nothing to worry about." She then walked out of the house, shutting the door behind her.

Zim stood there a little longer, wondering if he heard the violet one right. "'Don't provoke _him_'?"

Red walked down the street with Dib, both in an awkward silence as they headed toward Zim's base.

The human paused and put out his arm to stop the girl from going any further.

Red walked directly into the hand, then stopped as she felt the pressure. She looked up at Dib questioningly.

The boy pointed at the base as a girl walked away form it. "Isn't that Phoebe?"

Red looked in the direction he was pointing to see he was right. "Yeah, it is."

They watched as she walked away from the house. Red pushed Dib into a bush then jumped in herself as the purple girl headed toward them.

After she was out of hearing range, the paranormalist turned to his companion. "What would she be doing at Zim's?"

Red narrowed her eyes. "I don't know. But I'm going to find out." She stood up and walked out of the shrub. "You're on your own today, Dib." With that, she broke into a sprint and headed back to her house.

* * *

Phoebe walked into the house, humming to herself.

"Welcome home!"

She jumped at the cheery voice of Red, turning to face the alien leader. "Red! What're you doing home so early?"

Red kept a large smile in his face as he walked closer. "I just thought I'd hang out here for a while." He sat down. "So, how're you? You enjoying your time on earth?"

The purple one turned off his disguise, immediately knowing something wasn't right. "Red, what's wrong?"

"How's Zim doin'?"

Ah, so that's it! "What do you mean?"

Red lost the smile and looked down at the TV. "I saw you at his base today. Didja have a nice little tea party?"

Purple rolled his eyes and crossed his arms. "I went over to apologize for how extremely rude you are."

The crimson leader looked back up. "You went to apologize? You when to apologize to _Zim_?" he paused, then added with an after thought, "_you_**_apologize_**?"

"Yes, I did!"

"waitwaitwait, justaminute!" Red stood up, not liking the feeling of being shorter than Purple. "I didn't know you knew the meaning of that word, number one. And two, why Zim?"

it was obvious Purple was getting angrier by the moment. "Yes, I know how to be nice! And because Zim is the only other irken on this planet, and he has supplies! What if something happens and we need something from him?"

Red turned away and snorted. "We won't we have everything we need right here."

"We have nothing, Red! We left the massive with this dumb little disguise thing and the things in our paks! And who knows how long will be here!" the violet leader crossed his arm and scowled.

Red turned back to face Purple. "Quit worrying! Nothing bad's gonna happen, Pur. Trust me."

"You can't prove that!" Purple's voice was bordering a screech as he glared deeply. "You can't tell the future."

"Neither can you! And this fight is starting to get annoying! Would you quit being afraid of so many dumb little things! It's like that's all I hear from you. You just drone on and on and on! Life's gonna have surprises, my friend. You just have to tackle any opportunity you ca--" with that, Red was tackled to the ground. The crimson leader looked up to find Purple straddling him, glaring down. "What are you doing?"

Purple clamped his jaw shut. "I'm shutting you up. Your little speech was getting annoying."

Red growled. "Like you're any better. At least I don't flip out over every little thing!"

The violet tallest let out a snarl as his spider legs popped out of the pak, his hands finding there way to Red's throat. The other leader echoed his sentiment, the metal appendages clanking against one another like swords.

After a little under twenty minutes, the two found they were exhausted and in desperate need of air. So, Purple let go, collapsing on top of Red, panting slightly. Once the hands left his throat, the crimson leader sucked in a large breath of air, panting as well.

Both sets of spider legs retracted into their respected paks as the two tallest continued with the position they were in. after their breathing calmed, they began to realize the way they were. Quickly, Purple pulled himself off Red and scrambled to his feet, blushing hotly. Red stood up as well, trying hard to fight off the flush that threatened to take over his face.

After a moment of awkward silence, Red cleared his throat. "I should go do…I donno… something."

The purple leader nodded. "Yeah, I should too."

With that, the two walked in opposite directions, trying to push away the embarrassment.

* * *

"The stars a pretty bright tonight." Dib sucked in a lungful of air and let it out in a sigh.

Red nodded, keeping her eyes on the sky. "Some lights must be out or something."

The human cocked his head and looked back up "have you ever wondered what's out there?"

"Once or twice." That is, until she was ten.

The paranormalist sighed to himself and moved a little closer to Red. "what do you think is out there?"

Red tore her eyes away from the sky and cocked an eyebrow at Dib. "I thought you've been out there."

"Never outside the solar system. I never got that chance." He kept his eyes on the sky as he spoke.

The redhead followed his gaze before answering. "A lot of fueling stations, some restaurants; not particularly nice ones though. Many planets are probably at war with other planets. You know, that kind of junk."

The boy let out a chuckle. " You put a lot of thought into this, didn't you?"

Red snorted a little and smiled. "Nah, I just pulled all of that out of my ass." Of course, that was a lie. She looked over, suddenly getting a little uncomfortable with how close Dib was. "Um, I have to go." She pulled herself to her feet.

The human followed the suit. "Already?"

"Um, yup. I'll see ya tomorrow, Dib." And so, she walked away before the paranormalist could say anything more

* * *

Tapan: well, that's all for now! You know what to do! Just—

Torna: get away from me!

Jhkitty: but can't you see the colors?

Tapan: um, heh, just R&R and all that good stuff. Oh! And one other thing! To Lex, your e-mail didn't show up in your review, mine is on my profile, so please e-mail me anything you might want me to know. Ok then, see ya!


	6. Chapter 6 (Check Profile for info)

Tapan: Merry Christmas everyone! I'm sorry it took me so long to update this.

Torna/eating a candy cane/ she had no inspiration.

Jhkitty/a hat glued to his head/ bah, she coesn't need it. She can suck on her own!

Tapan: ;-; you know, Jho. You have no Christmas spirit. /cries into Torna's shoulder/

Jhkitty: stop calling me Jho!

Disclaimer: I don't own Invader Zim. However, last night I had a dream Jhonen gave me the rights. I was happy, but then I woke up and it was like "Dammit!"

Warning: slash, drunkness, RAPR, ZADR and RADR. Flame if you wishers!

* * *

Red walked through the door and heaved a sigh, turning off the disguise. His antennae perked when he hear the sound of giggling from the other room. Cocking an eye, he walked further into the house. "Pur?"

Suddenly, Purple jumped out from the side right in front of Red with a loud. "BOO!"

Startled, the crimson leader jumped back with a yelp, just barely grabbing hold of the door. One hand pressed to his chest. "Jeez, Pur! Are you trying to kill me?"

Face a little flushed, the violet irken continued to laugh before shaking a bottle in Red's face. "lookit what I found! It be a liquid that no burn! It's also yummy."

Red blinked and took the bottle away from his companion, reading the label. "…Budweiser…"

Purple smiled cutely and grabbed Red by the arm, pulling him over to the couch and sitting him down. "Have some, Red! It seems these monkeys made something tasty!"

"Hmm." Red looked into the bottle before taking a sip, long tongue licking at his lips as he thought about it, after a moment, he shrugged as he tried to ignore the weird little buzz the drink seemed to give him. "It's not bad."

"See? I told you! Didn I tell you! I told you good, huh?" Purple grabbed himself another bottle as Red took a large gulp from his own.

About an hour and two beers later, the two tallest were sitting on the couch, swaying back and forth and smiling like idiot.

With an extremely slurred voice, Red spoke, pointing at his co-leader. "You know, Pur. I don't give you 'nuff credict…yours a gewd guy and leader and stuuuff."

Dropping his bottle, Purple shook his head lazily. "noo I'm not! I do no good for Irk! You'd do much better wiffout me!"

The crimson irken frowned. "No I couldn'tn't! I woun't live wiffout you!" Red but and arm around Purple and rubbed his cheek against the other's "I luv you too much!"

Purple blinked and looked over at the other. "Wow, Red. Do ya mean dat?"

Red didn't answer. Instead he pressed his lips to the other tallest, a light hum in the back of his throat.

Purple sighed and shut his eyes, hands finding their way to Red's head, playing with the other's antennae idly.

The crimson leader let out a small moan and leaned into the touch, kissing feverishly.

After a while, the kiss broke. Both tallests looking into each other's wide eyes. Red blinked and clenched his jaw as they stared.

After a moment, Purple smiled widely and kissed his fellow leader on the chin. "You're cute!" he then leaned in and snuggled close to Red, antennae twitching every now and then.

Red just spaced out, trying to ignore Purple as the violet tallest sighed, his head falling to the red one's lap. His breath hitched a bit as one of Purple's hand found its way into his robes.

* * *

"Hey Red!"

"Ow…Do you need to talk so loud?" the red head covered her ears then began to rub her sore head.

Dib blinked, confused. "Is something wrong?"

"No, Dib, everything's fine. I just have a throbbing headache."

"Ah." Digging through his pocket, the boy pulled out a small bottle of aspirin and handed it to Red.

Red took it and blinked, cocking an eyebrow as she looked at the label. "You carry aspirin around with you?"

Dib shrugged. "Well, you never know when you need it."

Red smiled. "And with a head your size, the headaches must be constant."

The paranormalist glared and grabbed the bottle, pocketing it again. "Fine I guess you don't need them then."

"No! I was just kidding, Dib. Jeez, take a joke why doncha?"

Dib sighed and handed the bottle back to Red just as the bell rang. The girl flinched and glared up at the bell with a growl.

She looked up just in time to see Phoebe run past her, heading to class. The both paused, looking at each other with wide eyes. At the same time, a twin blush formed on their cheeks and the purple haired girl turned away, sprinting down the hall to her class.

Dib noticed the little exchange and blinked. "Did something happen between you two?"

Red turned away and opened the little bottle, forcing two pills down her throat before closing it and handing it back. "I'd rather not say now."

Dib blinked but left it alone as they headed to class.

* * *

Around lunch time, Red was feeling much better. Her head had stopped throbbing so much. She walked into the cafeteria and walked over to her usual table, finding phoebe already there, head down.

Head cocked to the side, she walked over and put a gentle hand on her friend's shoulder, shaking lightly. "Hey, Pur. Wake up."

"Ugh…no…" she nuzzled against her arm then sighed. "I've got a sick feeling in my Squeedly spooch. It's annoying."

Red frowned but then decided to leave her partner alone. Instead she sat down next to her and glanced around the room.

"Red!" the redhead looked behind her to see Jessica storming up, he minions following at her heels.

Red looked at them through bored eyes. "Okay look. I think it's obvious that we don't like each other, so why don't you just take the not-so-subtle hint and leave us alone."

"No! I'm sick of you two acting all superior to us. Like you're better than us, no! it doesn't work that way; we're better than you."

The red girl cocked an eyebrow. "You better than us?" she chuckled and stood up. "My dear moron, you have no idea who you're messing with!"

"Oh yeah?" the blond crossed her arms with a scowl. "And who exactly am I messing with?"

Red opened her mouth to speak, only to be interrupted when Phoebe launched up, the sick feeling momentarily forgotten. "We're nobody! Just you're average human girls! Yup, uh huh!"

Red glared at Phoebe, then to Jessica.

Jessica blinked, and then snarled at the violet girl. "It's not nice to interrupt you're little girlfriend. Let the bitch speak."

Red stifled at the comment and balled her hands into fists.

Phoebe glared warningly at her companion. "No."

Jessica just laughed. "How cute, A lovers spat!"

The expression in Phoebe's eyes changed. Before Red could register the change in her mind, the violet one snapped around and back handed Jessica.

All of the girls looked at Phoebe, shocked. As Jessica turned to look at Phoebe, she earned herself another slap.

Red blinked, jaw dropped. "Pur?"

Phoebe glanced back at Red, but otherwise ignored her as she glared at Jessica.

The blond held her cheek as her eyes narrowed. "How DARE you!" she then back handed the violet girl, hitting her right in the temple.

Or, more to the point, the device on the temple.

Phoebe held her head in pain, the headache starting to come back. She didn't notice the device had malfunctioned from the impact, her disguise starting to fade until everyone could see through it like a veil.

Luckily, Red was the first to notice it. Her eyes widened at the sight and she grabbed the other by the arm. Glaring at the small group in front of her, she plowed through and started to run down the hall, much to the confusion of everyone around them.

Pushing into the bathroom, she looked under the stalls before locking the door.

Phoebe/ Purple blinked, oblivious to the disguise's malfunction. "Red? What are you doing?"

"Pur, look in the mirror. You tell me what's wrong."

Blinking, the lavender one looked in the mirror, eyes widening at what he saw. "How-"

"Obviously, it wasn't put together right."

Purple pulled the little wire off and examined it in his hand. After a moment, he blinked over at his fellow leader. "I don't know what's wrong."

"Of course you don't" Red took the little machine away from Purple and poked at it before frowning. "I can't fix it here. I'm going to need some other machines."

"Well, Red, we don't have any here, now do we?"

Red bit her lip as she tried to think of a proper solution. She winced as an idea popped into her head. "But I know someone who would." She walked over to purple and pushed him in a stall. "Stay there until I get back."

"I don't wanna stay in here, it smells!"

"you don't have a choice, Pur!" with that she closed the stall and walked to the door. "I'll be back in a minute."

* * *

The crimson girl stopped once she got into the cafeteria, looking around frantically. She nearly sighed in relief when she spotted the person she was looking for, picking at his food in digust.

Without any further hesitation, she sprinted over, pushing past people and skidded to a stop behind him. "Hi, Zim!"

The poorly disguised irken turned around, looking up at Red with wide, confused eyes.

The look of confusion changed to surprise when the redhead grabbed a hold of the back of his shirt. After a moment, the event processed in his head and he began to struggle just as the exited the cafeteria. "Hey! Wait!"

Red kept a tight grip on the invader as she continued forward, not a word to the one she was dragging.

With an expressionless demeanor, Red pushed Zim into the bathroom and followed behind.

The smaller one stumbled in then shot up, glaring at the redhead. "You have no idea who you're toying with, stink beast! I demand you tell me--" he stopped talking when Red walked past him and over to a stall, pushing it open.

Red looked over at Zim with a sigh. "Well, Zim. I think this may clear a few things." Reaching into the stall, Red pulled out the purple leader, causing the tallest to fall over.

Purple looked up at Red and pushed himself off the floor with a glare. "Was that really necessary?"

Zim was dumbfounded. "muh…..muh, My Tallest!" now any intelligent being would be able to put two and two together.

Unfortunately Zim is not one of those beings. He glared over at Red and quickly positioned himself in between the crimson girl and Purple. "You DARE kidnap an irken!"

Red looked down at him incredulously. After a moment, she glared. "You idiot! It's me!"

"'Me' who?"

Red growled and turned of his disguise with a roar. "HOW STUPID CAN A PERSON BE!"

Zim's eyes opened impossibly wide at the sight of the crimson tallest.

Purple looked down at the invader then over at Red. "Well, isn't this a brilliant idea."

"Shut up, Pur."

* * *

About an hour later, Red was working on the little machine. Zim sat by, handing him supplies as he needed them. Behind the two, Purple was pacing back and forth impatiently.

"are you two done yet?"

"Pur, I swear if you ask that question one more time, I'm going to tear off your head and dropkick it!"

Zim's approach was less violent. He looked back at his leader. "We're working as fast as we can. Please be patient, my Tallest."

Red snorted and continued with the device. "suckup."

Zim ignored Red and turned back, watching the crimson leader work.

After a few minutes, the little contraption beeped. Red smiled triumphantly and handed it Purple. "All fixed!"

Purple took the device and put it back on his head. "It's about time!" turning it on, the little machine created the disguise once again. Phoebe winced as the bell rang and started to head out of the bathroom.

Chuckling a little, Red turned on his own disguise and followed before turning back to Zim. "remember, Zim. No one is supposed to know we're here, and that includes you. So treat us like humans, alright?"

The smaller irken shot to his feet and saluted his leaders. "Yes, My Tallest."

Red and Phoebe walked out and started down the hall. After a moment, the violet girl turned to Red. "How long do you think he'll keep away?"

The red head paused. "I give it six hours."

* * *

Tapan: yay! It's good to get back into mah fanfics. /sighs/ well, that's all for now! Have a merry holiday and stuff/tosses candycanes and presents to all reviewers/ 


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